So, before we get started here, I just want to establish that I wasn’t actually scared when I wrote that last letter. I was…uh…concerned. For the rest of the guys. Because, you know, they’re so unfamiliar with Fomorians. So, yeah. Concerned. Not scared. At all.
ANYWAY, now that’s out of the way, oh man, we have kicked SO MUCH ASS since I last saw you. Tatty Boggle? Bitch slapped back to his ugly Fomorian mama’s skirt. Richard Thornbrook? Took his sorry cyborg ass apart for a third time. Hopefully, the sword tree I planted into his skull will keep it from being four, because come on. That’s just sad. And Anansi, that spider jackass? Actually dead. Straight up killed him, just like I said I would. Snapdizzle don’t play, sucka.
We also saved ZZ Top, so you know, awesome-sauce.
Some other stuff happened too, and I’m gonna be honest, it’s confusing as hell, so bear with me. That Vincent guy is apparently the lost heir of the human kingdom and ALSO the reincarnation of some ridiculously powerful guy from a billion years ago who got corrupted and built Vor Thormil originally. Somehow he was also in the human war twenty-ish years back (like I said, it doesn’t make any sense) , and apparently was helping this one group of humans beat this OTHER group of humans, so the other group of humans summoned a demon to fight him, and Master Phung helped them do it. So THEN Corellon Larethian drops down from his hizzie on high, and goes “Aw Hell Naw!” He smacks Vincent so hard EVERY SINGLE HUMAN forgets what happened, and Vincent gets flung into our time (or something) the Vor Thormil artifacts popped out of him and got scattered everywhere, AND the demon he was fighting got imprisoned under ground for eternity. (Gods are O.P., yo)
The only problem is the demon gets free if Master Phung doesn’t do this ritual every once in a while, and I think the Vor Thormil people are trying to figure that out so they can stop him.
Oh, and somehow Arja’s weird religion thingy suppresses Vincent’s evil side. And
I accidentally told Mixmaster Z the thing about Vincent being the rightful ruler despite Arja not wanting me too Mixmaster Z figured out Vincent’s identity using his rad detective skills. I don’t know how he did it.
SO we took Vincent to Arja’s church in Shal’d and now we have to beat up some jackass governor that took over the city while we were gone. Or someone. I wasn’t actually paying attention.
So, yeah, lots to do. They’re saying something about Space Pirates, I gotta go.
Again, totally WASN’T SCARED,